Family Weekend

We just returned from Madison, where we spent the weekend with my mom and brother. Since there was no funeral service for my grandma in Michigan, I felt that it was important to be with family. Although it was a lot of driving for one weekend, it was a good choice.

Mom and I went through drawers of photos and found some incredible pictures of my grandparents. I'm working on a special project to commemorate their lives. I'm so excited to see the finished product.

Pictured here: Liliana entertains cousin Clayton and Grammy Joy with her favorite game, "Where's Liliana?"

Blessings, Ramona

Little Helpers

Liliana and cousin Clayton wash dishes with Grammy Joy in Indiana. Liliana says: "Thanks for my new dresses and jammies, Grammy!"

Madison Highlights: We enjoyed seeing Mom, Russ, Shawna, Luke and Clayton. Mom and I had a joyous Big Lots and Goodwill experience. Liliana played with her cousins & Grammy's wonderful toys. Wade played some serious cornhole (cornpone, as Big Joy says) and won 25 bucks.

Here's to down-home fun. ~Ramona

Bittersweet Days

I haven't said much about our upcoming Frozen Embryo Transfer (FET), because I've been trying to focus my thoughts on life's little joys instead of the daunting procedure ahead. With plenty of exciting activities on our calendar the past few weeks, it's been fairly easy to keep my mind occupied. But now I can't help but contemplate the road ahead. We're less than 72 hours away from my hospital visit, and the preparations are in full swing.

With the big event drawing near, my emotions have been running the spectrum. Although I am hopeful that the FET will lead to a pregnancy, I am also afraid of a negative outcome. Since this is our last assisted reproductive procedure, there is more riding on it than ever before. In addition, I am supposed to be stress free--both before and after the procedure. Apparently Murphy's Laws are in full effect, because our life has been anything but relaxing the past few days.

Liliana has been sick since Tuesday evening, and she has been miserable. Her coughing bouts were so severe last night that I was in her room every 15 minutes. No exaggeration. I tried bringing her into bed with me, but she had even more trouble sleeping in our room. We pray that tonight will be much better. Caring for a sick child is both emotionally and physically draining.

Even worse, my mom called me Thursday afternoon with the sad news that my Gramcracker is dying. It seems that she has no more desire to fight. According to the hospice nurse, Gram has less than a week to live. Mom is in Michigan with her right now, and things continue to go down hill. Please pray for my family as we try to celebrate her life while grieving her final days. Losing a loved one is difficult on so many levels.

On a positive note, Wade's parents have arrived in St. Louis. Once again, they have graciously accepted the role of caring for Liliana during my hospital stay and recuperation. What a blessing they have been throughout our fertility treatments!

Praying for healing, peace, sleep and babies. ~Ramona

Little Swimmers

Wade, Liliana and I spent the weekend with my family in Indiana. Liliana had an opportunity to spend time with her Grammy Joy, Uncle Russ and cousins Luke and Clayton. No matter how often we visit family, it never seems like enough. The children are growing and changing so quickly that if you miss a few months, you've missed major milestones.

The big highlight for Liliana was swimming in Robert and Chamaine's pool. For the very first time, she swam by herself with a little help from arm floaties. She and Luke loved swimming and jumping off the diving board so much that they literally had to be dragged from the pool.

We plan to spend many hours at the pool this summer. Hopefully Liliana will be swimming solo by September. Here's to sunshine...and lots of it!

Adjusting to Change

Liliana loves to clean her pearly whites with her new "Dora the Explorer" electric toothbrush. This little item has transformed our brushing routine from "Do I have to?" to "May I please!" She absolutely loves the sensation...and it doesn't hurt to have Dora, Boots and Backpack on the handle. Once again, I shout, "Hooray for modern technology!"

My sweet girl has been having a rough time adjusting to Mommy's absences and diminished ability to play. Since Liliana has a difficult time identifying and labeling her feelings (as all 2-year-olds do), she has been acting out in dramatic fashion. As much as I adore my daughter, I was relieved when bedtime finally arrived last night. She gave all of us a run for our money yesterday.

It is clear that the past few days has been bittersweet for Liliana. On one hand, she has spent a great deal of time with her beloved Grammy and Grandfather. But on the other, her world has been turned upside down. For all of her life, Mommy has been there 24/7; and now, Mommy isn't available all of the time. She has been trying to make sense of it, and we've all suffered the consequences. Hopefully things will go right back to normal when I finish recuperating. I have a feeling she'll bounce right back.

As far as my recovery goes, I continue to experience sharp pain in the area of my ovaries. They are still in the process of healing from the egg retrieval. I had a few mild pains in my abdomen this morning, and I've been praying that they were due to embryo implantation. The implantation process may occur any time this week, usually around this point. Time to pray, pray, pray!

Here's to a warm, snugly place for my embryos! Enjoy your Wednesday, Ramona

R & R

I'm spending this weekend resting, recovering and praying for healthy embryos in the hospital lab. The discomfort and lethargy have increased since yesterday, probably because I'm trying to do too much. We're so thankful that Grammy and Grandfather are here to help with Liliana and meals. They're such a blessing! I go back to St. Luke's for the embryo transfer on Monday morning. We'll know how our little ones are doing at that point.

Please pray for many healthy embryos. Hope you have a beautiful weekend! Ramona

Easter Celebration

Here we are in all of our glory on Easter afternoon (notice the heavenly rays of light shining down on us). Liliana is obviously saying the "ch" part of "cheese" as Mama Joy snaps the photo.
Sunday morning, Wade and I attended the church where I was baptized as a teenager. So many faces looked familiar, but the place seemed much smaller now that I've "grown up."
We enjoyed spending time with my mom over the weekend. Liliana played with her Grammy's toys, colored pictures, bounced around on a big orange ball and played sweet sonatas on the out-of-tune piano all weekend long.
We also had lots of time with my brother and his beautiful family. Liliana and her cousin Luke had a ball together while cousin Clayton seemed happy as a lark cruising around the house. Watching the kiddos was such a joy!
As we pulled out of my mom's driveway, I felt such sadness. Although we see my family several times a year, I wish for more. I miss them dearly, and I would love for Liliana to have close relationships with them.
Here's to family, near and far. Blessings, Ramona

Updates

Grammy Joy is in St. Louis for a weekend visit. Liliana is so excited to play little people with her "Gammy Doey" all day. It's nice to have a few days of girl-time with my mama & Liliana while Wade works on projects around the house.

I saw Dr. Chao for my first osteopathic manipulation this morning. Apparently, just about every inch of my back, neck and hips were out of alignment due to my unexpected trip on Tuesday. After about 30 minutes and countless snaps, crackles and pops...my body was back in business. I have to go in for weekly treatments to make sure the constant muscle spasms don't pull things in the wrong direction. The medications are doing a fabulous job of keeping the pain to a minimum. And, much to my delight, I actually slept last night and during nap time today! Someone gimme an "Amen!"

A giant thank you to our neighborhood friends who surprised me with a basket of bath and body goodies. What a thoughtful gesture to lift our spirits! Stacy, Torie, Jen, Jami, Cathy, Mary Jo, Lindy, Lynda and Jess--you rock!

Congratulations to Monica and Ricardo on the birth of Andres Jose (my new nephew) on Wednesday. Congrats to Julie and John, who welcomed baby Christopher on Tuesday. We celebrate your growing family, and we pray the Lord will soon grant us the same gift.

Thanks again to you, our faithful blog readers, for your prayers and comments. Your support truly is helping us through this difficult time. Bless you!

The Saga Continues

Today we sadly say goodbye to Grammy and Grandfather, who are ending their week's stay. They have been helpful beyond description, and we have appreciated every minute.

As for the IVF front, the pain in my abdomen is gradually decreasing, while a rash has emerged on my chest. Doc Pineda is tyring to figure out the cause so that it does not grow into a larger problem. I thought it was a minor issue, but he's concerned that it may cause breathing difficulty or anaphylactic shock. The primary suspect is low-dose aspirin, which I began taking yesterday morning (to help thin my blood due to MTHFR deficiency). The Progesterone injections shouldn't be the culprit, since I've already been taking them for a week.

Wade and I are hopeful that two embryos have found a warm place to nestle in for the next nine months. God willing, we'll be sharing good news with you on January 2nd. Until then, I must eat, drink, sleep and act like I'm pregnant so that I create the best environment for my little ones.

Thank you for your continued prayers and support! Ramona

It's All Worth It!

What a blessing it has been to have Dad and Mom Wicht here this week. I am so grateful! Liliana has soaked up every moment with them: pretending to cook jambalaya and ettoufe', playing with little people for hours and reading books in very dramatic fashion. Although she relishes the attention of the family, she definitely knows that something is awry. She has given Mommy the cold shoulder and tested limits more than ever. Toddlers are very perceptive.

The pain has intensified since yesterday morning. Whew! I didn't realize that I'd be totally out of commission for a few days. In addition to the post-op discomfort, I have a new side effect: sore and bruised hips from Progesterone injections. Because the Progesterone is in oil and injected IM, the shots make their presence known. But as I keep repeating, it's all worth it!

Wednesday morning at 7:30am is the embryo transfer. As usual, I am required to be there at 6:00am (most of you know that I am not exactly a morning person, so this is no treat). At least I'll be too tired to be anything but calm. We don't know the specifics, but we do know that fertilization occurred. The Dream Team will give us all of the details (i.e., how many embryos were fertilized and how many remain viable) Wednesday morning. Please keep praying for many viable embryos.

I know I've said it many times, but I have to thank you for taking a moment out of your busy holiday schedule to read this post and to pray for us. You are part of the reason this journey has been so rewarding and pleasant.

God bless you! Ramona

Princess for a day

What a day! I love having family in town, especially when they are here to help. With extra caregivers in the house, I have had my first real opportunity for "me time" in years. Woohoo!

Mothers, just imagine a world in which you are able to take a long, relaxing shower in the morning...even after the kids are awake. You take your time getting ready without a single voice yelling, "Mommy!" or "Honey!" You nap for almost two hours in the afternoon, just because you're feeling a bit tired. Homemade meals are prepared for you around the clock. The kitchen cleans itself. Imagine the stress melting away. Ahhh...total calm. This was my reality today. Although it is temporary, I feel like royalty!

Wade and I are very thankful for the outpouring of support and love we continue to experience throughout this process. Thank you for your prayers and cards. Thank you to those who have written comments here and to our personal email. We appreciate it more than you know!

Tomorrow is one of our two big days with IVF. Please pray that the doctors will extract 15+ eggs and that many embryos will result from fertilization. The more we have, the more chances for children in the future.

Hope you have a great weekend.
Lots of love,
Ramona