Bittersweet News and a Thankful Heart

As we continue to grieve the loss of our third child, my sister, Monica, just gave birth to her second son. Both Monica and Russell (my brother) are several years younger than me (4 and 5 1/2 years, respectively), and neither has had a single problem with fertility. At this point, they each have two children.

Of course, I love my siblings dearly and feel joy for their growing families. At the same time, however, celebrating with them is bittersweet for me. I guess you could say it brings many years of suffering and disappointment to the forefront. And right now, my pain is already as fresh and raw as it gets. If it weren't for this funny little character building a lego tower next to me, I don't know what I'd do. Thank the Lord for Liliana! She is truly our little miracle.

I'm also very thankful for the beautiful women in our church family. Last night I attended a social event to welcome our new pastor's wife (who is just fabulous). Throughout the evening, my heart was warmed by the encouragement and support I received from women I respect and admire. It was such an uplifting experience. I feel so blessed to be a part of a godly community of gals who love one another so well.

A special thanks to our dear friends and fold elders, Barb and Cid, for the gourmet meal last night. We were so delighted to take a break from frozen dinners! Poor Wade and Liliana are ready for the home-cooked meals to begin again. Slowly, but surely, Mommy's getting back into the swing of things.

My back and neck are giving me a great deal of pain right now, making it difficult to take care of business. (I still can't believe I fell down the stairs!) Fortunately, I'm getting by with an lovely cocktail of Lorazepam, Darvocet and Vicodin. Tomorrow's doctor visit will give us a clearer picture of the damage, and we'll be able to devise a treatment plan. Hopefully we're not looking at a long, intensive therapy regimen. I'm ready for the drama to end!