When we brought Leila Madeline home (exactly four weeks ago), we knew that the risk period would last 60-90 days. [In our case, the risk is that Leila's birthfather could fight the process and cause the adoption to fall through. As for Leila's birthmother, she's totally on board--in fact, she's the co-captain. She chose our family and is committed to the adoption...and, we adore her and are happy that she is a part of our lives.]
As usual, Murphy's law has applied to our legal situation, and we will likely exceed the 90 day mark. Our attorney stated that it will be "about" (which probably means more than) 60 days from this point until the coveted court hearing, the proceeding that upgrades us from "foster-to-adopt" parents to adoptive parents. And it's much more than semantics. After the hearing, we will have full legal rights and be free to make decisions in every aspect of Leila's life.
Right now, we are bound by foster care guidelines. Some of the restrictions are fine, but others are a burden. Examples: we must have permission to travel, we're unable to take her to the pediatrician we know and trust (because she's on medicaid) and we must report every detail to a social worker. Coupled with the fact that we are just guardians in the eyes of the law, it's a constant struggle to really feel like Leila is our child.
We are 100% committed to Leila and the adoption process. We adore her and know she belongs in our family. But loving a child like our own, while also knowing that she could be ripped from our arms, is extremely stressful. I feel like I'm living with a 100 pound weight on my shoulders, and it's absolutely exhausting. I can't wait until this weight is lifted and I can just love this little girl and be her mommy.
This is a difficult journey, but I am thankful that God has led us down this road. Despite my fear and anxiety, I trust His plan. I pray that the Lord continues to give all of us strength, stamina and hope, while protecting this adoption and ensuring that Leila Madeline is home to stay.
May God bless you and yours,
3 comments:
Thank you for your vulnerability and sharing. I can imagine that this is hard - the "almost, but not yet" of adoption. We are praying for you and are here to enocurage you through this - the love you are sharing is a great reflection of Christ's love for us. We pray that God will encourage your heart through this time of uncertainty.
Praying for "the process" and your hearts. You both are doing a great job with these little girls and the "process" the courts say you must follow. Love to you all!
April
Thank you for fully telling everyone what is going on. It sure would be difficult for Dave & I. Praying for you through the process.
love ya all a bunch.
k-
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