Goodbye Gram

My Gramcracker passed away this evening. Even though we knew she was reaching the end of her life, I was not ready for this heartache. I guess we are never truly prepared for the profound sadness evoked by the death of our dearly beloved.

I adored my Gram, and I always desired to know her more deeply. We shared a passion for the arts, particularly writing, drawing and singing. She always taught me to appreciate nature and embrace creativity. Grandma was a unique, imaginative, talented and extremely intelligent woman.

Not only am I remembering and missing my Gram, but I am also reeling from a related experience. The evening has been surreal.

Just before I received the news, Liliana and I were enjoying our "Girls' night out" dinner. All of the sudden, my appetite vanished and my heart began beating irregularly. I put my hand on my chest and felt the palpitations through my shirt. I became lightheaded and woozy, as if I were going to faint. The next moment, my odd symptoms disappeared, leaving me with an unusual sensation. The episode was so strange that I intentionally checked my phone to observe the time--in case it should be important for some reason. About ten minutes later, Mom called and said, "Your grandma is watching over you now."

I don't know what happened just before that phone call, but it's like I felt her somehow. I'm not into the paranormal, but I don't believe in coincidence, either. I don't know exactly how to explain it, but I know there was a connection.

Pictured above~Four generations of Jordan girls: Liliana, Mona, Gram and Mom.